Everyday like a child on Christmas morning I wake up hoping that Santa Baby has left me yet another sweet morsel from none other than The Passion of The Christ himself, Mel Gibson. Now I know there’s way more important things to write about but I prefer to address this story because it makes me laugh and let’s face it, laughter is the best medicine (except for if you have a disease then you would probably need real medicine…but I digress), Mel’s rants against his baby mom’s Oksana are like little candy filled clouds of happiness wrapped in whimsical phrases like “I’ll burn this Goddamn house down! But bl*w me first!” I mean really, if that’s not romance, then I don’t know what is. As a matter of fact there’s a pretty good chance that Shakespeare himself is rolling over in his grave because he didn’t come up with sugary sweet lines like: “I’ll put you in a f*ckin rose garden!” Honestly there’s nothing more tranquil and beautiful than a rose garden, so who wouldn’t want to be put there?
As if he knows that I am holding on to every single syllable Crazy-Mel makes sure to use all of the four letter words that shoot an arrow straight to my heart. No these aren’t your mother’s dirty words, oh no, this is real life sh*t. Among my favorite is the word c*nt which is underused and underappreciated in common American literature, but not in Mel’s world. He is single handedly bringing it back in a major way, which proves that he cares about teaching the babies. So to you Mel Gibson, thank you for your love and support, may you continue to be the amazing romantic c*nt that you are!
