VH1 = A Black Woman’s Worst Enemy

For many years now VH1 and I have had a love hate relationship. It started years ago with ‘Flavor of Love.’ Yes I will admit that season two of that debauchery was so scrumtralescent that I can barely breathe (if you don’t know where that is from check a classic SNL episode). My niece and I laughed for hours on end when one of the “full-figured” girls on the show was made fun of through the use of editing magic. Classic. Anywho, this time around, I feel that VH1’s main goal in life is to showcase all the black women who are stupid loud and willing to shake their asses on national television. Yes I know that this is a double-edged sword because as much as I hate it, I still watch it. I mean let’s keep it way too real ‘For the Love of Ray J’ was reality t.v. gold. Danger is a cameraman’s dream. Oh and that wonderful song: “Danger!…she smashed the homies! Danger….she smashed the homies!” if that’s not a hit I really don’t know what is. But yet and still, I digress. As I sit and watch this ‘Charm School’ bullshit I want to punch myself in the face. Really Bay Bay Bay? You’re educated? You’re not ghetto? Sorry but I checked with Jesus and he told me to tell you that saying that you’re educated yet appearing on a show on
VH1 immediately erases your education. What’s worse is that all the crazy black chicks are always from the bay (I’m guessing mostly Oakland…we know how THEM bitches be). Like really? I mean yes, I’m from the bay (Richmond!!!! You know this), and yes I curse like a sailor, and yes I am college educated, and actually get paid to be a “journalist” but here’s the difference: I am not on national television. Instead I like to save my bursts of foul language for awkward conversations with my mom, and Sunday school. I have class thank you very much. So to all of you black women out there, tall, dark, light, bald, skinny and fat, please please please do yourself, your mom and other black women, a favor and keep that shit at the house. Don’t be putting all of your worst qualities on blast all up and thru VH1. Not cute girl. Not cute. Oh and in case you were thinking of attempting to debate this notion with me by throwing in the obvious double standard that if a white girl acts a fool on t.v. no one calls her ghetto or uneducated---SAVE IT. Stop worrying about what the fuck white people do and respect yourself and set a good example for people that look like you. Now if you’ll excuse me…I have to get back to watching this show. It’s more potent than a vile of crack and I am powerless against it.